The aftermath of Zidane's headbutt heard 'round the world might be more distressing than the actual play. Sure, the what-could-you-possibly-be-thinking
meltdown has tarnished Zidane's marvelous career, but everyone else involved the continuing drama is proving a fool, too.
First, Materazzi was assumed to have
called Zidane, of Algerian descent, the “son of a terrorist whore," or so said a lip reader. A lip reader? Yeah, that's a reliable source. So reliable in fact
that another lip reader told the BBC that Materazzi wished Zidane "an ugly
death to you and your family" followed by "Go f*** yourself." Interview other players, coaches, the ref? No, let's hire a lip reader to crack the case.
Next, Materazzi is a stooge. Denying the
allegations, he said, "I'm not cultured and I don't even know what an Islamic terrorist is." What? Are you really trying to sell that one, Marco? OK, fine, the next time you take the pitch in London, Madrid or Bombay, ask the locals about Islamic terrorists.
That brings us to Algerian president Abdelaziz Bouteflik, who defended Zidane by saying, "We
are just human beings, our duty is not to judge, our duty is to understand." Yeah, that's great advice for the French. How'd that work in 1940?
Then, we have the asinine droolings of clown Bernard Henri-Levy in the Wall Stree Journal (sorry, no link, subscription only):
"Here is a man of providence, a savior, who was sought out, like Achilles in his tent of grudge and rage, because he was believed to be the only one who could avert his countrymen's fated decline. Better yet, he's a super-Achilles who—unlike Homer's—did not wait for an Agamemnon (in the guise of coach Raymond Domenech) to come begging him to re-enlist; rather, he decided himself, spontaneously, after having "heard" a voice calling him, to come back from his Spanish exile and—putting his luminous armor back on, and flanked by his faithful Myrmidons (Makelele, Vieira, Thuram)—reverse the new Achaeans' ill fortune and allow them to successfully pull together.
"And then this valiant knight who is a hair's breadth from victory and just minutes from the end of a historic match (and of a career that will carry him into the Pantheon of stadium-gods after Pelé, Platini and Maradona); this giant who, like the Titans of the ancient world, has known Glory, then Exile, then Return and Redemption; this redeemer, this blue angel dressed in white, who had only the very last steps to scale to enter Olympus for good, commits a crazy incomprehensible act that amounts to disqualification from the soccer ritual—the final image of him that will go down in history and, in lieu of apotheosis, will cast him into hell."
Is this guy for real? Ease up on the meds, dude.
Finally, Zidane today came clean about what made him snap: Materazzi talked smack about his mom and sis. No, No, not that! Single-handidly ruining France's World Cup chances because of wisecracks about your sister's holiest of holies? Yeah, that's reasonable. What's worse is this: "I can't regret what I did because it would mean that he (Materazzi) was right to say what he said." I guess we shouldn't be surprised with that kind of logic from the French.
Oh, by the way, Zidane denied Materazzi called him an Islamic terrorist. Fire the lip readers.
Even the "controversies" in soccer, sorry, futbol, are stupid.
Posted by Jason Thornbury at 7/12/2006 12:33:00 PM