Week 14 Reactions: Joys and Pains of Fantasy Football

After deciding to let others waste early-round picks on quarterbacks like Andrew Luck, Peyton Manning and Matt Ryan, you held strong and ended up with Andy Dalton, who came into the fantasy playoffs with eight touchdowns (one rushing) in the last three games, helping you clinch the top seed. You consider starting backup Ryan Fitzpatrick against the Titans, but Dalton got you here, so you stick with the red rocket.

Your backfield is strong, highlighted by mid-round star Devonta Freeman (thank you auto-draft for grabbing Freeman when you accidentally changed browser tabs seconds before your pick and got lost in a slideshow of the top 20 stadium parking lots to tailgate in and missed your pick, prompting extreme anger that you weren't able to land Percy Harvin), and made dominant by free-agent pickup Thomas Rawls. Your wideouts are very productive thanks to a breakout season from Allen Robinson, who already has over 1,000 yards and double-digit touchdowns, a steady contribution from Calvin Johnson, who came in with four touchdowns in his last three games, and looking as dominant as at any point this season thanks to Martavis Bryant making a leap over the last few weeks.

And don't forget letting others use early picks on tight ends like Rob Gronkowski, Greg Olsen and Jimmy Graham while you waited and grabbed Tyler Eifert to pair with Dalton.

You have an abundance of talent that your flex spot is a weekly debate. Do you roll with Jeremy Maclin? Vincent Jackson? Ryan Mathews? Michael Crabtree? Ronnie Hillman? Or maybe go with Travis Kelce against a weak Chargers defense, though playing two tight ends seems a little crazy for the fantasy playoffs. Your team is awesome, but let's not get stupid. You roll with Hillman, who is likely to get a ton of touches with C.J. Anderson banged up.

Before kickoff, you check your opponent's team, a mishmash of players who have no chance against your gladiators. Kirk Cousins? Ha, good luck. Oh man, not only did he have Marshawn Lynch but he also had Mark Ingram. Now he's heading into the playoffs with Tim Hightower and Isaiah Crowell! You almost feel bad about the bloodbath that's about to ensue but then you start laughing because you see that he's starting Doug Baldwin, Golden Tate and, oh my gosh, is that Ted Ginn? How did this guy even get into the playoffs? Oh right, fewest points against, of course. And he picked Marques Colston for his flex over Mike Evans? We might have to replace this guy next year, this is embarrassing. I mean, seriously, who starts Zach Miller in the fantasy playoffs?

By 1:00 p.m. EST you plop down on the couch and are ready to take in hours of Scott Hanson basically doing a play-by-play of endless touchdowns being scored by your team. And then, before you even touch the bowl of pretzels on the coffee table, you find out why fantasy football can be so awful.

Ted Ginn scores on a 74-yard play midway through the first quarter and then adds a 46-yard score later on. Wait, did Crowell just score too? Woah, nice catch by Colston for six. Uh oh, and another?

Oh good, an Andy Dalton highlight, probably a quick TD to Eifert. Nope, a red-zone INT; that's a killer. Wait, what's going on? Is he hurt? Why is he...oh no. Oh noooooo! Well, hopefully AJ McCarron will be able to find Eifert for another league-leading score. Except, he's now being evaluated for a concussion? What!? And now...the worst news of all: Thomas Rawls is OUT with an ankle injury. You've lost your starting QB, RB and TE before your seat even got warm. Oh great, Kirk Cousins just ran for a score. And there's Doug Baldwin in the end zone! When did this guy become Jerry Rice!?

You think, "maybe the second half will be better," only it gets so much worse. Two touchdowns for Tate, two more from Baldwin, two by Crowell (really!?) and one from Hightower. Well, you were right, this is a bloodbath, except you're the one covered in red. By the end of the afternoon games you've been demolished:

Week 14 Reactions

• Rawls will miss the rest of the season after breaking his ankle during Sunday's game against the Ravens, who know a thing or two about season-ending injuries, leaving DuJuan Harris to handle the backfield workload until Marshawn Lynch can return from his abdomen injury. Harris rushed 18 times for 42 yards, but the Seahawks relied on the arm of Russell Wilson again, as he passed for 292 yards and five touchdowns (three to Baldwin and two to Tyler Lockett, who also chipped in with 104 yards). Wilson has thrown for 16 touchdowns and rushed for another in the last four games, while Lockett became the second rookie in league history with at least five receiving touchdowns, one kickoff return for a touchdown and one punt return for a touchdown. The first: Gale Sayers.

• Bengals coach Marvin Lewis didn't provide many details about Dalton's thumb injury, but it's believed to be broken, which would likely sideline him for the rest of the season. The Bengals need just one win to clinch a playoff spot but they'd be hard pressed to win a postseason game without Dalton. Despite the quarterback change, A.J. Green had another great game against the Steelers, finishing with 132 yards and a touchdown on six catches.

• Blake Bortles' impressive season rolled right along, as he passed for 250 yards and three touchdowns while also rushing for a score in a shocking 51-16 win over the Colts, who actually led 13-9 at halftime. Allen Hurns, Allen Robinson and Julius Thomas all scored, with the latter finding the end zone for the fourth consecutive game. Bortles has thrown for 30 touchdowns this season and finishes up with games against the Falcons, Saints and Texans.

• Drew Brees threw for 312 yards and two touchdowns, the latter of which pushed him ahead of Dan Marino on the all-time passing touchdown list with 421. The three ahead of him: Peyton Manning (529), Brett Favre (508) and Tom Brady (425).

• And speaking of Marino, Matthew Stafford broke his record for fewest games to 25,000 passing yards, doing so in his 90th career game, two ahead of the Hall of Famer. And in classic Stafford fashion, he threw 46 passes, was sacked four times and the Lions lost to the Rams.

• Congratulations to Robert Turbin, who scored the first touchdown of his career Sunday against the Packers. It was the longest streak to start a career in league history and came on his 269th carry, according to NFL Network's Andrew Siciliano. He's now only 207 behind all-time leader Jerry Rice and 174 behind all-time RB leader Emmitt Smith.

• Ryan Fitzpatrick threw three touchdown passes Sunday, one each to Brandon Marshall, Eric Decker and Bilal Powell, though one overlooked note is that Chris Ivory set a career-high in rushing yards, now sitting at 914. Up next: the Cowboys, who were gashed for 230 rushing yards, including 124 by Eddie Lacy, on Sunday.

• Rob Gronkowski returned from his knee injury and promptly scored in the first half of Sunday night's game against the Texans. After the Raiders beat the Broncos earlier in the day, the Patriots retook the top spot in the AFC, and with Gronk back, it's clear the path to the Super Bowl will go through Foxboro...again.