There are typically three kinds of commercials while you’re watching football: (1) Outright lies; (2) Based on lies; and (3) Misleading. In Category 3, are your basic cellphone and car commercials that display the product to which they purport, but associate with it all sorts of glamorous activities to which they have no relation whatsoever. Yeah, sure LeBron James is pulling up in a Kia. Category 2 includes the fast food commercials that have good-looking people or hipsters eating at those places, having a great time. It’s possible you’d find on rare occasion (2 am, drunk) some of them there, but if an ad agency went the documentary route, we’d be seeing mostly poverty, misery and ill-health. In Category 1, there are the flat-out lies, like the notion low-quality, mass-produced light beer is a staple at great parties/bar scenes, or Papa Johns (Fritos?) has “natural ingredients.” I suppose everything’s “natural” in some sense – after all uranium is an element, so nuclear waste is ultimately from nature too. But I don’t think that’s what they were going for.
Just when I thought the Raiders would blow the game and maybe even the seven-point cover, they drive the length of the field, use up nearly the entire clock and all of the Chiefs’ timeouts for their first win. The two booth reviews on the Chiefs last drive were painful – I’m happy they got them right, but it broke up the rhythm and the drama. Otherwise, it was a decent game.
Even with all the cowardly punting we’ve seen in recent years, Week 11 was an especially egregious display. Et tu Chip Kelly? “Riverboat Ron” Rivera is now playing nickel slots, hoping his bankroll will last the week, and Mike McCoy and Tony Sparano traded punts on fourth-and-short from mid-field as if in tacit agreement to apologize while saving face. Keep in mind Ken Whisenpunt’s team doesn’t play until tomorrow night.
Despite the low score, this was a decent game through almost three quarters. Both offenses were moving the ball, and there weren’t a lot of penalties. It fell apart after the bogus PI call led to a Dolphins TD, and Doug Marrone punted on 4th-and-6 at midfield, down 10 with nine minutes left. But compared to the last few standalone games this was an all-time classic.
This slate didn’t make an especially strong impression on me. A lot of the early games could have gone either way, and the late ones were all competitive early until one by one they devolved into blowouts. There was an epidemic of offensive pass interference, but I’m pretty sure it’s caused by over-diagnosis.