The Spread Offensive: Gridiron Wrestle Mania

The Spread Offensive: Gridiron Wrestle Mania

This article is part of our The Spread Offensive series.

In a column named after a high-flying offensive scheme that is designed to put points on the board in the blink of an eye, largely by aerial assault, we're going to talk about running backs this week. Yes, I realize the irony. With the rousing success of last week's rap column, I'm going to return to the comparisons. Instead of channeling my inner Notorious B.I.G., though, I'll compare some of the top running backs in the nation to some of my favorite wrestlers of all-time. The fake wrestling. Yes, everyone is well aware it's fake. It's a male soap opera. Up until about the age of 16-17, that was my jam. So this will have a slight bias toward the era of wrestlers I saw (late 1980s through early 2000s). Sorry, John Cena.

LSU's Leonard Fournette - The Rock

"It doesn't matter what your name is!" That's what Leonard Fournette must think when he barrels over an unsuspecting defender, or jukes another helpless linebacker out of his jock strap. Fournette has drawn comparisons to Adrian Peterson and Herschel Walker. I've also heard Lawrence Phillips and even Bo Jackson. He gets the honor of being compared to Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson because of his versatility. Not only can Fournette physically dominate the opposition at 6-foot-1, 230, but he also has the agility and quickness to make tacklers miss, as well as the breakaway speed to hit the home run. As The Rock has morphed from wrestling icon into one of the

In a column named after a high-flying offensive scheme that is designed to put points on the board in the blink of an eye, largely by aerial assault, we're going to talk about running backs this week. Yes, I realize the irony. With the rousing success of last week's rap column, I'm going to return to the comparisons. Instead of channeling my inner Notorious B.I.G., though, I'll compare some of the top running backs in the nation to some of my favorite wrestlers of all-time. The fake wrestling. Yes, everyone is well aware it's fake. It's a male soap opera. Up until about the age of 16-17, that was my jam. So this will have a slight bias toward the era of wrestlers I saw (late 1980s through early 2000s). Sorry, John Cena.

LSU's Leonard Fournette - The Rock

"It doesn't matter what your name is!" That's what Leonard Fournette must think when he barrels over an unsuspecting defender, or jukes another helpless linebacker out of his jock strap. Fournette has drawn comparisons to Adrian Peterson and Herschel Walker. I've also heard Lawrence Phillips and even Bo Jackson. He gets the honor of being compared to Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson because of his versatility. Not only can Fournette physically dominate the opposition at 6-foot-1, 230, but he also has the agility and quickness to make tacklers miss, as well as the breakaway speed to hit the home run. As The Rock has morphed from wrestling icon into one of the most popular actors in the world, so too will Fournette eventually come to have millions ... and millions ... of fans. The LSU running back has rushed for 631 yards and eight touchdowns in three games. He's third in the nation in rushing and has played one fewer game than nearly every other running back. He's averaging an absurd 8.6 yards per carries. The Heisman voters are sure to smell what Fournette is cooking.

Other possibilities:
Andre The Giant, The Undertaker

Georgia's Nick Chubb - Ric Flair

Woooooo! Did anybody ever really want to face Ric Flair? Sure, he was a little older than most of his opponents, nearly all the time, and he wrestled forever, but that familiarity also seemed to work to his advantage. And when he got that wide-eyed look, even if you knew the patented slap across the chest was coming, there was still nothing you could do to stop it. Nick Chubb was the known commodity heading into the 2015 campaign, but that still has not made him any less dangerous. Chubb entered the season with eight consecutive 100-yard rushing games. That number has now climbed to 12, tying the school record set by the aforementioned Herschel Walker. Chubb will look to set the mark Saturday against a ferocious Alabama front seven, but it would be a mistake to count him out. That's just what The Nature Boy would have wanted.

Other possibilities:
Hulk Hogan, Stone Cold Steve Austin

UCLA's Paul Perkins - Mankind

Perkins is not the quickest running back, nor the strongest. He plays on the West Coast, and as a result suffers a little bit from the East Coast/SEC bias. Quarterback Brett Hundley got all the attention in 2014, as Perkins ran for about the quietest 1,500 yards in NCAA history. In 2015, true freshman gunslinger Josh Rosen has been hyped as the next great quarterback, leaving Perkins in the background despite the 4-0 start for the Bruins. Just as Perkins has received almost no publicity for his stellar play on the field, so too did Mankind a/k/a Mick Foley. However, despite not being the biggest or most athletic, Perkins' work ethic and no-nonsense attitude has allowed him to succeed out of the spotlight. Foley was revered for his ability to take punishment, and at 5-10, 210, Perkins knows sometimes going up the middle he's going to get battered and bruised. Even his quiet demeanor fits Foley's profile, as the quirky Foley only reluctantly began to use his orating skills later in his career with whacky characters like Cactus Jack and SockO. Perkins does not have to resort to any gimmicks for UCLA, though, as 514 yards and six touchdowns through four games for the undefeated Bruins speak for themselves.

Other possibilities:
Kurt Angle, Sgt. Slaughter

Indiana's Jordan Howard - Chris Jericho

Y2J is perhaps one of the most underappreciated wrestlers of all time. A six-time world champion and record nine-time Intercontinental Champion, the Canadian-born Jericho has wrestled for nearly two decades in the public spotlight, constantly reshaping, reimagining and reinventing his character. He was incredibly consistent, even when other stars received more notoriety. Jordan Howard of the Indiana Hoosiers is the leading rusher in college football through four games. Yes, you read that correctly. Not Fournette. Not Chubb. Not Perkins. Howard rushed for 1,587 yards and 13 touchdowns last season -- and he wasn't even the leading rusher on his own team! That honor went to Tevin Coleman, who ran for 2,036 yards and 15 scores and now plays for the Atlanta Falcons. With the starting job all to his own in 2015, Howard has rushed for at least 145 yards in every game in 2015. The only downside for Howard is that the Hoosiers have not yet started conference play, and their first game pits them against the No. 1 team in the country, the Ohio State Buckeyes. We're going to see really quickly if Howard can do to OSU what he did to FIU and Southern Illinois.

Other possibilities:
Bret "The Hitman" Hart, Shawn Michaels

Utah's Devontae Booker - Triple H

Booker might be my favorite back in college football. I'll be honest; Hunter Hearst Helmsley was never one of my favorite wrestlers. However, I think that was kind of the point. For large chunks of his career, he was hated. And you were supposed to hate him. As the leader of Degeneration X, his pompous attitude wore exceedingly thin, when I just wanted to see Stone Cold Steve Austin guzzle beers and give Vince McMahon the Stone Cold Stunner. Still, you had to respect Triple H's talents. And he commanded your attention. Not in the same way the Rock did, but merely by his presence. His bravado. His stare. When Triple H was in the ring, you knew it was going to take somebody's best to beat him. When I see Booker line up in the backfield, that's what I see. The Utes made a choice to tell the world that they were going to feed Booker 25-30 times in every game. That was their plan. Teams come into the game knowing they will have to stop Booker to beat Utah. And they still can't do it. Only one back in college football has more touches than Booker through four games, and that is Justin Jackson of Northwestern. Booker is averaging more than 100 yards rushing per game when the opposition knows he's going to be fed the ball. Of course, Utah has been anything but a one-trick pony this season. The Utes are undefeated and have had stellar play from quarterback Travis Wilson as well as their defense. Wilson scored five times in Saturday's 62-20 massacre in Eugene against the Ducks. But it all comes back to Booker. Wilson can shine because of all the attention given to Booker. In that respect, he's just like Triple H. Suck it. (Had to throw that in there).

Other possibilities:
"Macho Man" Randy Savage, Razor Ramon

Want to Read More?
Subscribe to RotoWire to see the full article.

We reserve some of our best content for our paid subscribers. Plus, if you choose to subscribe you can discuss this article with the author and the rest of the RotoWire community.

Get Instant Access To This Article Get Access To This Article
RotoWire Community
Join Our Subscriber-Only College Football Chat
Chat with our writers and other RotoWire College Football fans for all the pre-game info and in-game banter.
Join The Discussion
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Jesse Siegel
Siegel covers college football, college basketball and minor league baseball for RotoWire. He was named College Sports Writer of the Year by the Fantasy Sports Writers Association.
College Football Picks: Big Ten Championship Game
College Football Picks: Big Ten Championship Game
Georgia vs Texas SEC Championship Picks
Georgia vs Texas SEC Championship Picks
FCS National Championship Odds and Picks
FCS National Championship Odds and Picks
College Football Picks: Big 12 Championship Game
College Football Picks: Big 12 Championship Game