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The Nightcap (Down on Bended Knee Edition)

Adrian Beltrehit another home run from his knee. That doesn't make him a great fantasy play, but it makes him cool as a mother.

Notables

• I don't get Clay Buchholz. First of all, I didn't know till yesterday that he's rocking a groundball rate north of 50|PERCENT|. Now this: 9 IP, 2 K, 1 BB, 48|PERCENT| GBs, 0 R. What?!? He's fun to watch, too, but I'm still suspicious.

Jose Bautista hit two almost identical, absolutely giant, dongpieces tonight versus A.J. Burnett, giving him 18 on the season. He was 3-for-3 overall with a double and those homers.

• Is Brett Cecil a nerd with those glasses? Just asking.

• I am genuinely excited about Felipe Paulino. He's got a 95-97 mph fastball. He's got a slider that just won't stop – not even to the tick-tock or whatever. Today he did this: 8 IP, 7 K, 2 BB, 5 H, 1 R. Of course, he DOES have one problem, in that he pitches for Houston.

Aaron Harang tonight: 16 balls in play, 9 of them grounders, 8 of them hits. That's bad luck. Target him as a trade option, as owners are probably souring on him despite his pretty good component stats.

• You've probably never heard of him because he's wicked underground, but this guy Adam Wainwright had himself a game this evening: 9 IP, 8 K, 1 BB, 2 H, 0 R.

Colby Rasmus' new contacts seem to be working. The center fielder went 2-for-3 with a homer and a walk.

• File this under Go Figure: Justin Masterson posts an xFIP under 4.00 and goes 0-5. Tonight? He pitches 5.2 IP, walks 6, and somehow allows only a run en route to his first win. Did I mention I heart Justin Masterson?

Jason Heyward struck out in all 5 of his PA today. That's notable inasmuch as Heyward is still AWESOME AT BASEBALL, and said fact oughtn't be forgotten.

Kelly Johnson walked 4 times versus Colorado. Is that the OPPOSITE of a Golden Sombrero?

Caution, Warning

Livan Hernandez' stun gun is set to regression. Sellsellsell!

Brennan Boesch went 2-for-3 with a double and homer tonight. At the risk of getting all wet-blanket-y all up in this piece, allow me to say this: Brennan Boesch is very probably not for real. He's hitting better now than he's basically ever hit in the minors. His BABIP is close to .400. He's MAYBE a league-average hitter. At 25, that's something, but not something great.

Stolen Bases

Juan Pierre (22), Michael Bourn (18), Ichiro Suzuki (17), Jose Reyes (14), Drew Stubbs (12), Matt Kemp (8), Brandon Phillips (8), Hanley Ramirez (8), Cameron Maybin (6), Gordon Beckham (4), Troy Tulowitzki (4), Neil Walker (2), Danny Valencia (1).

Caught Stealing

Jason Kendall (5), Juan Pierre (5), Jay Bruce (2), Andruw Jones (2).

 Save Chances

Brad Lidge, converted. He got 2 K on some nasty slidepieces. No base runners.

Francisco Rodriguez, converted. Blah blah blah.

Matt Lindstrom, converted. He got a K. Otherwise uneventful.

Matt Capps, converted. That's his 18th.

Brian Wilson, converted. With 2 K and nothing else.

Jonathan Broxton, converted. Threw 2 K pieces. Dude is goo-ood.

Jon Rauch, converted. In the 11th inning.

Manuel Corpas, blown and lost. Colorado was winning by 1 in the bottom of the 9th at Arizona. Then they weren't winning so much. Whoops.

Closer, Non-Save

Carlos Marmol came in, embarrassed one guy, got another guy out. Pitched 0.2 IP.

Andrew Bailey got the loss in Oakland's extra-inning game versus Minnesota. He got 2 K, though.

Chad Qualls got the win when Arizona scored against Colorado's Manuel Corpas in the bottom of the ninth. In other words: something GOOD actually happened to Chad Qualls.

Non-Closer Outing

• Someone named Edward Mujica had 3 K in 2 IP for San Diego today. Now he's got 29 K versus only 3 BB on the season.

Tyler Clippard got his 8th win. Is he a nerd with those glasses?

Drew Storen pitched again, got a K, gave up a hit, and got a hold.

• Princeton alum Craig Breslow registered 4 K in 1.2 IP for Oakland. I always get him confused with Clay Hensley. This is another reason to do so.

Lineup-ology

Jeremy Hermida left after the top of the fifth inning with a left forearm contusion, shortly after a collision with teammate Adrian Beltre. Have you ever seen how Beltre's built? A left forearm contusion sounds like getting off easy.

Brett Hayes played catcher for the Marlins tonight. Nothing to see here.

Omar Vizquel started at third base today in Mark Teahen's absence. Also, he batted second. Did you know that studies in lineup optimization teach us that the second spot in the order is basically the most important?

Bobby Crosby started at first base today with Pittsburgh facing lefty Jonathan Sanchez. At least, I THINK that's the reason.

Jamey Carroll played third base for Casey Blake, who's been dealing with back troubles. Reports have Blake returning after the weekend.

Michael Ryan continues to see time at first base for the Angels in Kendry Morales's absence. He also continues to be a 33-year-old minor leaguer.

The Young and Potentially Restless

Chris Tillman made his second start of the season, and it didn't go so hot: 1.1 IP, 2 K, 2 BB, 5 H, 4 R.

Buster Posey! (Note: This is what we in the industry call "hard-hitting analysis.")

• Twin prospect Danny Valencia got the start at third base today versus Oakland. He'll probably return to the minors once Michael Cuddyer returns from his bereavement leave.